With only four girls left, it’s make or break time. Alexandra wanted best picture last week, but she came in second again. Keep dreaming, Chunk. Raina is annoying, as usual. Angelea sees Krista as her main competition because she keeps winning everything. Andre Leon Talley arrives at the house wearing a ridiculous giant black tent, and brings flowers for each of the girls. He gives them tips on the industry, talks about dreck, Vogue, and how he worked as Andy Warhol’s bitch. This is a big deal for Angelea, who came from the ghetto and wants to show everyone she can make it to the top.
Tyra Mail – “Time 2 get ready 4 a different kind of runway. Pack a bag and get ready.” Jay meets the girls at the airport and tells them they will fly to Queenstown for their next photoshoot. The plane takes off, and Miss J shows up to announce that the girls will have to walk the aisle for their next challenge. The winner will get to walk in New Zealand fashion week and will also win $2000 in designer jewellery. Jay and J want to see some personality from the girls this time. Alexandra is the only one with heels in her bag. Angelea has one heel…um…why? Alexandra steals someone’s sunglasses halfway down the aisle, and does a little flight attendant move at the end. Cute, but one stop too many along the way. Krista had a good walk and lots of attitude. Meh. Angelea was doing her club thing again. It’s too bad, really. Raina was like the girl next door. And I’m not talking about Elisha Cuthbert here people. This one’s pretty boring. And walks like a linebacker. Bahaha. So it’s either Alexandra or Krista…and Krista wins again. Mother effer. Broad’s like Eddie Murphy with an ice cream cone when she wins. Ridiculous.
Next up, the girls are hauled out to their photoshoot location in the middle of scenic nowhere. The girls will have to be the ugly amongst the pretty. This should be easy. They also find out that the next elimination will send two of them home. 50/50! Krista is up first, and she looks like a man in a big nasty dress. Alexandra feels “all Sweeney-Toddy” in her corset. She’s looking good, but not edgy like Jay wants. But I think she should wear black lipstick more often. Raina needs to step out of the box this time. Turns out she’s too pretty, not ugly-pretty. She takes direction well, but couldn’t quite achieve what Jay was looking for. When Angelea gets negative criticism from Jay, it usually works for her…but maybe not this time. The girls fly back to Auckland, and Krista’s shwag is everywhere. Once again, she gets an extra $1000 worth of jewellery since she won last week’s challenge.
At judging, Tyra announces that the two finalists will walk in an Anna Sui fashion show. The judges look at the photos from this week, with all the girls dressed as edgy queens, personifying the art of ugly-pretty. Ugh, Tyra. Raina looks a little evil in her profile shot. But it’s actually not bad. Jay rats her out, she was too pretty and couldn’t break through. The judges decide she’s getting better, showing her talent. Angelea looks scared, like she just saw a ghost. Or is a ghost. I’m not sure how I feel about this one. The judges feel Angelea needs exposure, travel and to meet other people. Krista looks like shit. The judges love it. She just won the whole thing. Damn. The judges think she is consistently improving and listening, but her face is the only thing that could be a problem. Because she doesn’t know how to use it, not because it’s manly. They like that part. Alexandra needs to wear heels. She comes out wearing shorts and flats, and it’s not good. She kinda looks like a little boy in her picture. A boy who shoots poison darts out of his eyes. The judges all say she has a great body shape…for a fat girl. She knows how to make her body work, but they don’t know what she’s all about. Obviously they don’t care much, or they would have asked her over the last 9 weeks.
The first finalist is Krista. Of course.
And she has a fit. Again. Settle down Eddie. Like you weren’t the obvious favourite. Then we hear what’s wrong with the rest of the girls – Alexandra has a rare amazing body, and a great face too. But her pictures are just okay, inconsistent. Raina – the second coming of Brooke Shields – only does well when she’s interested in the photoshoot idea. Angelea has an interesting and edgy face, but needs to take criticism and actually use it to help her. And the second finalist is Raina. Are you kidding me? Ugh.
So Alexandra and Angelea are going home. Alexandra just leaves. Angelea does her hammer dance for everyone on her way out. Tyra is impressed with her attitude, because it means she’s not pouting anymore. Shoulda kept this broad.
Here’s the part where I found out this is a 2 hour finale. Oops, how did I not know that?
Raina is all excited. As usual. Holy shnike! Krista is all business, she just wants to beat Raina. I think she might actually beat Raina if it’s not over soon.
Tyra Mail – Blah blah blah…the girls need to pack an overnight bag, cause they’re taking a helicopter to a lodge on what looks like a private island. Miss J is there with scripts for the CoverGirl commercial they will shoot the next morning. Raina is confident. Krista is nervous about remembering her lines. As always, there will be a commercial shoot and a photoshoot for a print ad. And little Nicole is back to tell the girls what to expect, reading her lines like a robot. Whatever, I still love her. Krista thinks Raina will be too fake and hyper, but Krista will be more realistic and relatable. Krista has her lines memorized and doesn’t want cue cards, but she loses it after a few takes and forgets all her lines. She finally gives up and asks for the cue cards, but she’s in good spirits and is able to laugh it off. Raina’s next, and she’s about half as good as Krista. Maybe.
The next day, Nigel shoots their Seventeen cover. Nothing special here, but they both look pretty good. They go back to their apartment, and Tyra is pretending to set up camera equipment. Now that they’re part of the Top Model family, she wants to take a family portrait. But something is missing…their families! What is this, survivor? I swear, Tyra doesn’t have one original thought in her head. Their parents have been flown in for a quick photo op with them. Krista’s mom says their family motto is “pride, determination and resilience.” Uh, wait a minute, you have a family motto? This is weird.
Time for the Anna Sui rock-and-roll-circus-themed happy smiley fashion show. Nicole will open the show, and Alasia, Jessica, Alexandra and Angelea are back too. I guess since they were already in NZ, they might as well stay and play. Lucky girls. All the judges are in the audience, and Andre is wearing a fleece blanket. Not good. Krista looks good, but Raina is so bloody boring on the runway. No way she can win this. Oh, and the clothes are ghastly. Overall…boring. After the show, Tyra talks to each of the finalists about how it went. Krista was being herself on the runway, and wants to show other girls that they can do the same. But just the tall skinny black ones, okay? Raina let loose and had fun. Tyra tells her she’s beautiful because she’s odd looking. Apparently that’s supposed to be a compliment.
The girls meet with the judges one last time. The outfits in this room are absolutely ridiculous. First, the judges talk about the fashion show. Krista has a hard edge, but seemed real. She was able to pull this off with light and airy energy, and just a little too much cheese. Raina was heavy-footed (aka linebacker), “like a Clydesdale.” Oh dear! Then we see the girls’ CoverGirl shots. Raina is soft and cute. Krista is serious and a bit sleepy – no smize here! Next is the commercial. Raina has a nice voice and enunciates, but she looks squinty and nervous. Krista looked more natural, but she’s still a little ghetto.
And America’s Next Top Model is….Krista.
I think we all saw that coming for the last 2 weeks! And if you just can’t get enough of Tyra and stupid girls…there’s one more episode next week called “Chubby Bunny”, a recap and unseen footage of Cycle 14.
Congrats to our winner, Kirsten! I like non-fat lattes. Just saying.
C U Next Time, kids!
duh.
May 13, 2010
May 11, 2010
ANTM Episode 9 – Hobbits vs Models (I really think they shoulda called this one 'Oh Mylanta!')
This week’s intro/synopsis: Alexandra’s ready to get rid of the skinny tarts. Krista still looks like an old man. Raina’s eyebrows are taking over the apartment. Jessica doesn’t like mean girls. Alexandra and Krista is mean girls.
Tyra Mail – “Who says u can’t fit a square peg in 2 a round hole?” This doesn’t sound good at all. The girls meet Mr Jay at Hobbiton, aka The Shire from the Lord of the Rings movie set. With Jay is Sarah McLeod, who played Rosie in the LOTR movies. Really? Rosie. Who cares? Well not Angelea, cause she has NO idea wtf is going on. She doesn’t even know what a Hobbit is. Well hopefully that doesn’t matter, because this is a photoshoot challenge. Each girl will have only 5 frames, and have to pose in a hobbit’s doorway without looking absolutely ridiculous. Turns out this isn’t really a big deal, it’s just a pose in a circle. Meh. And the winner of the challenge is…Krista. And since she won last week’s best photo, she gets the $3000 prize from the designer AND the extra $1500 bonus shwag. Bu-ooh! Angelea is pissed, but who wouldn’t be when they just lost to an effin’ old man. The new mean girl alliance takes this opportunity to make fun of Angelea’s club walk for what seems like an hour. Lame. Girls are stupid.
Tyra Mail – “If u want 2 be a true top model, u might have 2 shadow 1.” Oh Mylanta! The girls head to a vineyard where they will have to find the light, like grapes on the vine. A bit of a stretch, Jay. And then, Oh Mylanta, Tyra Banks appears, she’s going to be the photographer this week! Well that explains the weird photoshoot idea. Tyra talks to the girls about what look she wants to give each of them, then she leaves them to practice their smize in the mirror. All the girls are giving themselves their fiercest looks. And then there’s Jessica. She has no idea what she’s doing. For the photoshoot, the girls have their hair caked with clay and they have to pose in the shadow of different fabrics and patterns that are held over them. Tyra keeps telling them to look like they have a secret that they don’t want to tell. Or that they do want to tell. Ugh. Shut it.
Oh Mylanta, it’s elimination time. Alexandra’s picture is beautiful. She’s finally standing out. There’s not much shadow for her to push through, but maybe that’s what makes it even more impressive. She can actually look good. The judges think she looks exotic. Wow, I really didn’t see that one coming! For real. Raina isn’t so great this week. For the first time, the judges have more criticism than love for her eyebrows…I mean, photo. Angelea also has a good shot, but her eyes aren’t focused on anything. Jessica’s is just sort of…blah. You can’t really see her face, and Tyra tells her the shadow is wearing her, and not the other way around. Um, you put a big nasty wicker chair right in front of her face, of course it looks like shit. Krista’s shot seems to be the favourite, and Tyra pretty much tells her she’s gonna win the whole thing. A+. EFF. And so, best photo goes to Krista. Really, it’s not that great. I thought Alexandra’s was better, but she gets runner-up again this week. Then comes Angelea. And that leaves Raina and Jessica are in the bottom two. And the loser is…Jessica. Oh Mylanta, Raina’s safe for another week!
Tyra Mail – “Who says u can’t fit a square peg in 2 a round hole?” This doesn’t sound good at all. The girls meet Mr Jay at Hobbiton, aka The Shire from the Lord of the Rings movie set. With Jay is Sarah McLeod, who played Rosie in the LOTR movies. Really? Rosie. Who cares? Well not Angelea, cause she has NO idea wtf is going on. She doesn’t even know what a Hobbit is. Well hopefully that doesn’t matter, because this is a photoshoot challenge. Each girl will have only 5 frames, and have to pose in a hobbit’s doorway without looking absolutely ridiculous. Turns out this isn’t really a big deal, it’s just a pose in a circle. Meh. And the winner of the challenge is…Krista. And since she won last week’s best photo, she gets the $3000 prize from the designer AND the extra $1500 bonus shwag. Bu-ooh! Angelea is pissed, but who wouldn’t be when they just lost to an effin’ old man. The new mean girl alliance takes this opportunity to make fun of Angelea’s club walk for what seems like an hour. Lame. Girls are stupid.
Tyra Mail – “If u want 2 be a true top model, u might have 2 shadow 1.” Oh Mylanta! The girls head to a vineyard where they will have to find the light, like grapes on the vine. A bit of a stretch, Jay. And then, Oh Mylanta, Tyra Banks appears, she’s going to be the photographer this week! Well that explains the weird photoshoot idea. Tyra talks to the girls about what look she wants to give each of them, then she leaves them to practice their smize in the mirror. All the girls are giving themselves their fiercest looks. And then there’s Jessica. She has no idea what she’s doing. For the photoshoot, the girls have their hair caked with clay and they have to pose in the shadow of different fabrics and patterns that are held over them. Tyra keeps telling them to look like they have a secret that they don’t want to tell. Or that they do want to tell. Ugh. Shut it.
Oh Mylanta, it’s elimination time. Alexandra’s picture is beautiful. She’s finally standing out. There’s not much shadow for her to push through, but maybe that’s what makes it even more impressive. She can actually look good. The judges think she looks exotic. Wow, I really didn’t see that one coming! For real. Raina isn’t so great this week. For the first time, the judges have more criticism than love for her eyebrows…I mean, photo. Angelea also has a good shot, but her eyes aren’t focused on anything. Jessica’s is just sort of…blah. You can’t really see her face, and Tyra tells her the shadow is wearing her, and not the other way around. Um, you put a big nasty wicker chair right in front of her face, of course it looks like shit. Krista’s shot seems to be the favourite, and Tyra pretty much tells her she’s gonna win the whole thing. A+. EFF. And so, best photo goes to Krista. Really, it’s not that great. I thought Alexandra’s was better, but she gets runner-up again this week. Then comes Angelea. And that leaves Raina and Jessica are in the bottom two. And the loser is…Jessica. Oh Mylanta, Raina’s safe for another week!
May 2, 2010
ANTM Episode 8 – Welcome to New Zealand
The girls pack their bags to fly to New Zealand, and Krista gets to take Angelea with her in first class. Oh, those poor people who paid all that money to be in first class… Oh, and on a side note, Jessica thought New Zealand was somewhere above Canada. Yeah. When the girls arrive they go out to the countryside where they are met by a group of men in skirts who do a creepy screaming tribal dance. Then out comes Miss J with one of the judges from NZNTM. They announce to the girls that there are cabs waiting for them with their portfolios inside, and they will be going directly to their go-sees. Straight off the plane. Yikes. There are 6 designers to choose from, and of course the girls have to be back to the modelling agency by 5:30.
Raina has a face for an ad campaign, but a boring walk. And it didn’t help that she had to follow Krista at the swimwear designer, which made her look tubby compared to the stick woman. Alasia has the perfect curves for swimsuits. Angelea has a strong walk and seemed to be the favourite at all the designers. Jessica is too commercial. Krista was teenaged Bambie. Hm. I think that’s good? Alexandra was wearing Uggs, and the designers hated that she was so casual. At the end of the day Alasia, Krista and Raina are late, so they are out of the challenge. But since Krista won best picture last week, she still gets to share the challenge prize, free stuff from the go-see designers she met. Jessica booked only 1 of 4 go-sees. Alexandra booked zero. Angelea booked all 6 go-sees and won the challenge. That’s a lot of designer shwag! The girls go to their new penthouse suite, collect their winnings, and hit the hay. These broads do not deserve the gorgeous view they have!
Tyra Mail – “All we need is one. The rest is just fluff.” Bring on the sheep! The girls head to the farmland where Mr Jay is there to tell them about their next photoshoot with Mr Nigel Barker. Yum. All six girls will wear the same dress and model with sheep. Wo. And Krista is afraid of animals. Good luck girlfriend! Well, I gotta say, the dress is really quite boring. Lets see who can make it look good! Alexandra is ready to step it up and start over in New Zealand, and she has a good photoshoot. Jessica…not so much. Nigel’s not impressed. Alasia was overthinking it and doing the same pose over and over. Uh oh. Raina was amazing as usual. This girl is boring me to death. Angelea was feeling so confident, and then she just tried too hard. Krista had an amazing shoot, and practically climbed all over Prince the sheep. I guess she’s over her fear of critters!
The girls meet the judges at panel. Looks like Tyra took a different plane to New Zealand. I think it stopped in the 80’s and she went shopping. In her old closet. Cuz her pants are about 6 inches too short. Blech. Raina has a great shot and, omg, the judges love it! What else is new. Boring. Next! Alasia’s picture isn’t great. Alexandra marches out with attitude, probably because she knows she killed the photoshoot. It’s looking a little too sexy for a picture with a sheep, but at least she did her job this week! Jessica looks like she’s riding the sheep. Yikes. The judges tell her that even though she has a very commercial look, she can still look high fashion, she just has to try. The judges love Krista this week, and how she made the dress stand out. Looks like she could do it again! Angelea walks up, and Andre hates her dreck dress…um, she won it in the go-see challenge. Apparently it belongs in the club (I disagree, it’s hideous no matter where you are!), so Angelea decides to show the judges how she would walk the room at the club. Disaster. And now that everyone is uncomfortable…lets look at her photo. The judges don’t love her picture at all, but I don’t think it’s that bad. Not the best, but not as terrible as they’re making it out to be. So, best picture this week goes to…Krista. Again. Followed by Alexandra, Raina and Angelea. Tyra tells Angelea to suck it up and stop pouting. That leaves Alasia and Jessica in the bottom two. Alasia is lacking focus and not living up to her potential. Jessica is pretty and can be very commercial. And this week’s loser is…Alasia. Finally.
Um, did I just get booted from the pool? Oh damn!
Raina has a face for an ad campaign, but a boring walk. And it didn’t help that she had to follow Krista at the swimwear designer, which made her look tubby compared to the stick woman. Alasia has the perfect curves for swimsuits. Angelea has a strong walk and seemed to be the favourite at all the designers. Jessica is too commercial. Krista was teenaged Bambie. Hm. I think that’s good? Alexandra was wearing Uggs, and the designers hated that she was so casual. At the end of the day Alasia, Krista and Raina are late, so they are out of the challenge. But since Krista won best picture last week, she still gets to share the challenge prize, free stuff from the go-see designers she met. Jessica booked only 1 of 4 go-sees. Alexandra booked zero. Angelea booked all 6 go-sees and won the challenge. That’s a lot of designer shwag! The girls go to their new penthouse suite, collect their winnings, and hit the hay. These broads do not deserve the gorgeous view they have!
Tyra Mail – “All we need is one. The rest is just fluff.” Bring on the sheep! The girls head to the farmland where Mr Jay is there to tell them about their next photoshoot with Mr Nigel Barker. Yum. All six girls will wear the same dress and model with sheep. Wo. And Krista is afraid of animals. Good luck girlfriend! Well, I gotta say, the dress is really quite boring. Lets see who can make it look good! Alexandra is ready to step it up and start over in New Zealand, and she has a good photoshoot. Jessica…not so much. Nigel’s not impressed. Alasia was overthinking it and doing the same pose over and over. Uh oh. Raina was amazing as usual. This girl is boring me to death. Angelea was feeling so confident, and then she just tried too hard. Krista had an amazing shoot, and practically climbed all over Prince the sheep. I guess she’s over her fear of critters!
The girls meet the judges at panel. Looks like Tyra took a different plane to New Zealand. I think it stopped in the 80’s and she went shopping. In her old closet. Cuz her pants are about 6 inches too short. Blech. Raina has a great shot and, omg, the judges love it! What else is new. Boring. Next! Alasia’s picture isn’t great. Alexandra marches out with attitude, probably because she knows she killed the photoshoot. It’s looking a little too sexy for a picture with a sheep, but at least she did her job this week! Jessica looks like she’s riding the sheep. Yikes. The judges tell her that even though she has a very commercial look, she can still look high fashion, she just has to try. The judges love Krista this week, and how she made the dress stand out. Looks like she could do it again! Angelea walks up, and Andre hates her dreck dress…um, she won it in the go-see challenge. Apparently it belongs in the club (I disagree, it’s hideous no matter where you are!), so Angelea decides to show the judges how she would walk the room at the club. Disaster. And now that everyone is uncomfortable…lets look at her photo. The judges don’t love her picture at all, but I don’t think it’s that bad. Not the best, but not as terrible as they’re making it out to be. So, best picture this week goes to…Krista. Again. Followed by Alexandra, Raina and Angelea. Tyra tells Angelea to suck it up and stop pouting. That leaves Alasia and Jessica in the bottom two. Alasia is lacking focus and not living up to her potential. Jessica is pretty and can be very commercial. And this week’s loser is…Alasia. Finally.
Um, did I just get booted from the pool? Oh damn!
ANTM Episode 7 – Big Hair Day
After Angelea’s number one picture last week, she won’t shut up about how great she is. And Krista’s decided she’s gonna get the number one pic this week. Alexandra’s getting frustrated because she sucks. Raina misses Brenda and doesn’t know what she’ll do if Jessica goes home…oh, I wish... Anslee’s still going on about her baby and baby daddy.
Whitney from the hills/the city shows up…are you kidding me? What is this bullshit! She’s joined by former guest judge and former model Pat Cleveland, who talks with each of the girls about who they are…snooze. The girls get to dress up in Whitney’s clothing line – omg, lucky! – and go out for the night. They show up at a seedy drag queen bar (is there another kind of drag queen bar?) and apparently Jessica is afraid of drag queens. Golly dang! She’s literally hiding behind someone. Too bad it’s Pat Cleveland, cause I’m not sure she isn’t a drag queen herself! And speaking of drag queens, Miss J comes out and announces that this will be a runway challenge with personality. The girls will have to show off their personality that Pat coached them on earlier. The audience voted by applause, and Krista’s mannequin turn won her the challenge. Anslee, however, got zero applause. Silence. Ouch. But I think she was right, she was being herself, and that was the point of the challenge!
Tyra Mail – “2morrow could be a hairy situation, don’t get tangled.” The girls meet Mr Jay, who tells them about their photoshoot – their outfit will consist entirely of…hair. Ew. Another idea Tyra stole from someone else, of course. The girls are divided into 2 teams and each has a crazy hair stylist captain. This is too weird for words. One team is Weaven Steven with Krista, Angelea, Raina and Anslee. The other is Derek J with Alasia, Jessica and Alexandra. I don’t really get the point of the whole team thing, they were basically just split up and told to heckle the girls on the opposite team. Lame. Alasia’s dress looked like a rooster tail and Alexandra’s made her look like a big hairy pear. Yuck. This photoshoot is disgusting. And it looks like the only thing that might save Alasia is Alexandra’s shitty performance.
And just when I thought Tyra couldn’t get any crazier…the girls get to judging, and all the judges are acting tired and decide to take a nap. But they can’t sleep. So in walks a shepherd, and he supposedly leads in sheep…which are surrounded by CG fog, and clearly not even in the room, but the girls are looking down and oohing and aahing at the ground for effect. There’s something about counting sheep and catching zees, so the judges start pulling Z’s out of clouds above their heads. Wtf is with this stupid effin show! Worst thing I’ve ever seen. Tyra pulls down on a big letter Z, and down comes a New Zealand poster. The 6 remaining girls will be going to New Zealand. At this point, I don’t really care, and I just threw the remote at the tv. Let’s just look at the pictures already…
Jessica’s picture is just okay. Krista looks like an effin ostrich. Bahaha. But I guess the judges don’t think so, cause they’re impressed. Anslee looks like she’s shitting a bird’s nest. The judges think she’s a little stiff and only like her face in this shot. Hm, I wonder why. Maybe because she’s wearing an outfit made of HAIR. Alasia’s shot looks great, but she didn’t have any variety in her film. Alexandra. Blah. Blah with a 50’s face. Angelea looks ridiculous and her outfit looks too loose, but the crazy judges like it. I think she looks confused. Raina gets the same critique as always, the judges just love her no matter what. I think they should vote off guest judge Whitney whatsherface for being useless and looking even worse. Tyra announces that the best photo winner will get to fly first class on the 22 hour flight to New Zealand. And the top photo goes to Krista, followed by Angelea, Raina, Jessica and Alasia. So the bottom two are pretty but bland Anslee and pretty decent but lacking desire Alexandra. And the girls who’s going home is…Anslee.
I think that’s one of my girls…is it bad if I can’t remember?
Whitney from the hills/the city shows up…are you kidding me? What is this bullshit! She’s joined by former guest judge and former model Pat Cleveland, who talks with each of the girls about who they are…snooze. The girls get to dress up in Whitney’s clothing line – omg, lucky! – and go out for the night. They show up at a seedy drag queen bar (is there another kind of drag queen bar?) and apparently Jessica is afraid of drag queens. Golly dang! She’s literally hiding behind someone. Too bad it’s Pat Cleveland, cause I’m not sure she isn’t a drag queen herself! And speaking of drag queens, Miss J comes out and announces that this will be a runway challenge with personality. The girls will have to show off their personality that Pat coached them on earlier. The audience voted by applause, and Krista’s mannequin turn won her the challenge. Anslee, however, got zero applause. Silence. Ouch. But I think she was right, she was being herself, and that was the point of the challenge!
Tyra Mail – “2morrow could be a hairy situation, don’t get tangled.” The girls meet Mr Jay, who tells them about their photoshoot – their outfit will consist entirely of…hair. Ew. Another idea Tyra stole from someone else, of course. The girls are divided into 2 teams and each has a crazy hair stylist captain. This is too weird for words. One team is Weaven Steven with Krista, Angelea, Raina and Anslee. The other is Derek J with Alasia, Jessica and Alexandra. I don’t really get the point of the whole team thing, they were basically just split up and told to heckle the girls on the opposite team. Lame. Alasia’s dress looked like a rooster tail and Alexandra’s made her look like a big hairy pear. Yuck. This photoshoot is disgusting. And it looks like the only thing that might save Alasia is Alexandra’s shitty performance.
And just when I thought Tyra couldn’t get any crazier…the girls get to judging, and all the judges are acting tired and decide to take a nap. But they can’t sleep. So in walks a shepherd, and he supposedly leads in sheep…which are surrounded by CG fog, and clearly not even in the room, but the girls are looking down and oohing and aahing at the ground for effect. There’s something about counting sheep and catching zees, so the judges start pulling Z’s out of clouds above their heads. Wtf is with this stupid effin show! Worst thing I’ve ever seen. Tyra pulls down on a big letter Z, and down comes a New Zealand poster. The 6 remaining girls will be going to New Zealand. At this point, I don’t really care, and I just threw the remote at the tv. Let’s just look at the pictures already…
Jessica’s picture is just okay. Krista looks like an effin ostrich. Bahaha. But I guess the judges don’t think so, cause they’re impressed. Anslee looks like she’s shitting a bird’s nest. The judges think she’s a little stiff and only like her face in this shot. Hm, I wonder why. Maybe because she’s wearing an outfit made of HAIR. Alasia’s shot looks great, but she didn’t have any variety in her film. Alexandra. Blah. Blah with a 50’s face. Angelea looks ridiculous and her outfit looks too loose, but the crazy judges like it. I think she looks confused. Raina gets the same critique as always, the judges just love her no matter what. I think they should vote off guest judge Whitney whatsherface for being useless and looking even worse. Tyra announces that the best photo winner will get to fly first class on the 22 hour flight to New Zealand. And the top photo goes to Krista, followed by Angelea, Raina, Jessica and Alasia. So the bottom two are pretty but bland Anslee and pretty decent but lacking desire Alexandra. And the girls who’s going home is…Anslee.
I think that’s one of my girls…is it bad if I can’t remember?
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